Academic Editing Graduate Research Summary

I edited an academic assignment written by a Japanese PhD nursing student. The goal was to naturalize the English, improve clarity, fluency, and professional tone while preserving the writer’s intended meaning. I helped refine complex ideas for an international academic audience and ensured terminology aligned with field-specific standards.

Original:

Thank you for the good correction of the last entry. I'm delighted that you pointed this out to me. I want to modify some words because we have specified terms (e.g., #InternetUse.)  I'll send you the modified documents in the next entry.

Perhaps, this is proofreading; it's might be out of your [scope of] work, but I'm happy with your agreement with this assignment.

The most challenging thing in this assignment is grasping what I have to say clearly. My teacher for academic writing said the same things in lectures. I've contemplated much in Japanese in the last entry. 

This is the following assignment from the last entry:

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- Research Method: 1) Research survey 2)Health education program implementation

     1)We’ll be an epidemiological longitudinal survey. A questionnaire survey will be conducted and analyzed statistically.

     2)To study specific methods for implementing health education and implement and evaluate them in cooperation with various organizations.

- Items for joint research

     Prolonged Internet use has become a health problem in various aspects, including physical activity, sleep, optic nerves, brain, addiction, etc. I would like to capture perspectives from various fields, including benefits. Please tell me comments in your aspect.

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I'll be handing these out for use in the interaction event for PhD students. Good luck!❤️ 

Corrections:

Research Methodologies:

1. Epidemiological Longitudinal  

    Survey 

2. Health Education Program 

    Implementation

We’ll be conducting an epidemiological longitudinal survey to gather data by employing a questionnaire which will be distributed to our target demographic. The resulting answers will be analyzed for possible trends and correlations.

We'll study specific methods and effective ways to implement an educational program to disseminate our findings. We will evaluate those methods while working closely with educational institutions, government agencies, NPOs, and volunteer organizations.

Items for Joint Research:

Prolonged Internet usage has become a serious health problem with detrimental effects on physical activity, sleep, optic nerves, the brain, addiction, etc. My plan is to draw on interdisciplinary perspectives to explore both the negatives effects of prolonged Internet usage and potential benefits, if any.